If you’ve never played Baldur’s Gate 3 with its nudity censor turned on, it straight up gives everybody a fig leaf like they’re cartoon characters

I’ve really appreciated how Baldur’s Gate 3 and Cyberpunk 2077 treat us like adults: that’s right, baby, our RPGs have tasteful premium cable nudity now, throw that formerly de rigueur loincloth diaper in the trash and feel the breeze. Both games, however, have a censored mode for more impressionable audiences, and while Cyberpunk just slaps a pair of briefs on V and calls it a day, Baldur’s Gate 3’s solution had me cackling when I saw it in action.

Brave cyber sojourner Traditional_Put8471 on the BG3 subreddit went where no gamer has gone before, sampling the more chaste side of things in Larian’s notoriously horny masterpiece out of sheer curiosity. I turned the option on in my own game as well, and yep, it’s that simple: gone are Baldur’s Gate 3’s smorgasbord of customizable private parts, instead replaced with a wee fig leaf like something out of a cartoon.

She’s right behind me, isn’t she. (Image credit: Larian)

This really is the funniest thing Larian could have done here, another comedic coup from the masters of RPG slapstick. It feels perfectly of a piece with the studio letting us talk to all the animals in their games or shove any NPC into a bottomless pit, an indefatigable commitment to keeping it goofy that I will never grow tired of.

Of course, you better believe I’ll never stop going “hog wild” with Baldur’s Gate 3’s full nudity, no matter how funny this is. We’re all adults here, and besides, I’ve already had to endure the shame of a loved one observing me trying to decide whether a Half-Orc paladin gets penis option A or B. Worse yet, I’ve had to explain to my brother who has a grown up life and a family why I recommended him a game with extensive genital customization⁠.

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